Sunday

3/26/06 - A Happy Heart

Despite being very upbeat lately, I’ve felt kinda down today and very, very tired. We went to see “Failure to Launch” at the theater. Fun movie. I felt really good afterwards. Unfortunately we stayed for another movie… which turned out to be very depressing. I wanted to leave, but thought “we paid for this, so I’ll stay.” Now, how stupid was that?!?! I should have left ‘cause I just paid to get depressed. I did have Junior Mints though… and that’s a very good thing! J

Lesson learned: Pay attention to and follow my instincts. Don’t do what I think I should do; do what will give me a happy heart. (Now, didn’t I already learn this lesson a few days ago?) It’s not what costs money that matters – it’s how we feel.

Mmmmmm…

As I’m writing in my journal… there’s a purring cat by my side. How can I not SMILE?

While transferring my journal entries to the website last week, I realized how many “signs of hope and healing” I’ve been receiving from nature. Could that be an indication that I need to experience the outdoors more… is that where I’ll find a new sense of peace… a sanctuary? There are woods behind our new house that I thought I would take advantage of often, but it’s difficult to reach the path because of the hillside from our yard. Wish there were steps. I absolutely love walking in the woods… I need to find places where I can do that… places close by, and not too hilly. Places I can go to maybe after chemo treatments, where I can relax and feel close to nature and to God… where I can just be peaceful. I’ll be on the lookout and ask around.

* * *

I just picked up a devotional book that friends gave me a few days ago. And the first thing I read is:

“God will teach us His ways, so that we may walk in his paths.” –Isaiah 2:3

and…

“God has showed you what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” –Micha 6:8

The purring cat by my side just moved even closer, with her head resting on my arm.

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